smells like ass

so, about the weekend... the subject line pretty much says it all. everything smelled like ass.

damn, i still smell like ass. wtf? (and don't tell me to wipe my upper lip, MIKE.)

other than that, i had a LOT of fun. from what i can remember...

we got in on saturday about 3ish... i think. can i just say that new orleans has some of the most inconvenient driving ever. it is my second most hated cities to drive in. (not that i was driving, but still...) everything is so ass backwards. (there i go with the ass again)

we checked in and went to the voodoo music fest... unfortunately, we missed the killers. i kinda wanted to see them. we got some sonic youth, talib kweli, cypress hill, mix master mike, green day, john digweed, beastie boys. that was just on saturday.

i don't like green day's music. especially their new stuff. i have a certain fondness for their older stuff. reminds me of the good ol' days or something, i guess. but, goddamn, they put on a good show, though. i mean, they were really entertaining. i don't know what their frontman's name is, but he was really great.

oh, they did this thing (i don't know if they do it in every city or not) where they ask people in the audience if they can play the drums, then they drag someone out of the crowd... and then they make them play a simple (pre-selected) beat... while this kid's playing, they get a bassist who's playing a line and then while those 2 are playing, they grab a guitarist... all easy stuff. and they play while he sings some short song... anyway, i can only imagine that those kids were soooo excited. it probably will have made their entire lives, thus far. (i say kids... i don't know how old they were. they looked like teenagers, though.)

he gave the guitar kid his goddamned guitar. if i were that green day fan, i would've had an orgasm on stage. and he made the bassist do a stage dive. for some reason, that made me giggle. i think the drummer got shafted.

but even if it was easy and i was the world's best drummer/bassist/guitarist, i'd for sure just CHOKE. i don't think i could play in front of that kind of crowd! jeezus.

afterwards, we took jules back to the hotel... she wasn't feeling well. and then we headed out. i'm the worst friend ever. we never got that 3 gallon hurricane :( there was no way we could drink that with just the 3 of us. (steve, me, steve's friend)

we went to pat o'brien's first. when we first started walking there, i kinda hated the french quarter. it just smelled like ass.... seriously. i could hardly breathe without wanting to gag... but we finally got to POB's and got a hurricane. i had maybe... 2 sips and i could feel it. 5 sips, and i had this big ol' shit eating grin on my face... (someone wanna tell me wtf shit eating grin means, really?) by the end of that hurricane, i was FUCKED UP. and i told the guys i couldn't drink anymore.

then we went to razoo's. they say i had 5 shots there. i only remember 3... maybe 4. the 4th is kinda blurry. damn. i wish i had pics right now. they give you shots in a test tube looking thing and the drink chick puts the closed end in her mouth and then pours it into your mouth. uhm. never mind. i'll find a pic to post. maybe. heh.

we had some other drinks somewhere. i don't remember. i think i ate something, too. hrm. whatever. oh yeah... we had beignets! mmmm... cafe du monde... we got maybe 4.5 hours of sleep...

and then on sunday, we headed to the french open air market... it was great... and we got muffalettas at the central grocery. mmm... so good. i want more. saw the mississippi. saw ... uhm... was it jackson square? went back to bourbon street to see it during the day. the ass smell wasn't quite so bad during the day. it was a lot cleaner... i liked it.

went back to the voodoo music fest. caught de la soul, tribe called quest (GREAT show), velvet revolver (jules and i had to leave almost immediately. they SUCK ASS), mauro picotto, and while they all went to see kid rock, i watched ferry corsten. i just don't see kid rock's appeal.

went back to bourbon street that night. jules was feeling better. she and i both got hand grenades. and i'm not sure what else... i got beads. i'm not posting pics.

DUDE. and we got jules to flash! wooohooo! hehehehe... it was cool. the first time she flashed, she got like a shitload of beads. i was like, HEY! that's so unfair. damn. i have to flash like 3 times to get the same number of beads. rat bastards. we can't ALL be like D's and shit. fuckers.

i so wasn't going to because steve's friend was there... and i work with him. but after he'd seen them once, hey, it's not like it was going to be something new or anything. that was an accident, too. i thought he was behind me, but he snuck around. jackass. oh well.

we were up on a balcony... got to see lots of cocks (thanks, guys!), hairy asses (no thanks, guys!), hairy chests and backs (ew)...

met these 2 boys. they were so cute. steve wasn't on the balcony yet... they were totally hitting on jules and me... they were from birmingham, alabama. hehe... anyway, i wasn't wearing my real wedding ring, but i was wearing this really cheap band on my ring finger. 15 minutes later, one of them (shit, i don't remember their names! hehe) says, "oh my god. you're married, aren't you?" (by this time steve's up on the balcony) i say yes and he wants to know where my husband is. i pull steve over... and he's saying to steve, "let me see your wedding ring! let me see your wedding ring!" like we're lying to them or something. steve wasn't wearing his ring, either... but i guess they finally believed us. then they ran far away from me. hehehe. it's so funny whenever people find out i'm married... at least i know their true intentions. hehe. that they don't think i'm a cool chick or something, they just want ass.

by the way, when we're travelling, we don't typically wear our wedding rings, not because we're going to cheat or anything (ahem, JULES heheh) but because it's just one more thing we have to keep track of. i can't sleep with my rings on. they bother me. that's because my diamond is SO friggin' huge. j/k. i just can't sleep with them on.

i think i killed off lots of brain cells. i can't remember shit today.

the weather was so nice! not like cali today :( wtf? i came back to shit weather :(

oh, and i counted no less than 81 lance armstrong ugly ass yellow live strong bracelets... and one guy had on 2. he REALLY supports lance and the cancer research, i guess. damn. i hate those bracelets.

okay. that's the weekend wrap up. i am sure i'm forgetting huge chunks. i guess you'll have to check jules' blog to find the missing pieces. i really don't remember right now.

and i'm tired. had some trouble getting back here, but we're back. and i'm just happy that it doesn't smell like ass.