i'm baaaack! (long post)

i made it back. i didn't kill my parents. and the KKK didn't get me. phew! hehe...

on the way out, the trip started out horribly. we BARELY made it out to the plane. actually, the plane waited a few minutes for us... they knew we were coming out. the lateness? that was my parents' fault... good lord, they were slow that morning...

on the way out to the plane, this woman is chasing me because i left my neck pillow at the x-ray tables at security. my neck pillow is a monkey... i LEFT MY MONKEY PILLOW!!!! anyway, that was nice of her... she could've just left it, i guess... frontier is a pretty good airline. you have to pay $5 for direct tv, but i wasn't watching, anyway. maybe i was just happy that they waited for us...

anyway, we get to denver and we've only got a few minutes to get to our gate. we run to our gate (mind you, i'm carrying my bag which i'm not supposed to do and running to the gate) and ... the flight is delayed. which in a way is good because we didn't miss our flight, but in a way was bad because i totally tweaked my back.

we wait around... my mom is trying to lecture me on real estate and money. LIKE THEY'RE ONE TO TALK!!!! jeezus christ. my parents have filed for bankruptcy TWICE. they're in no position to give me any sort of money advice. seriously. so i'm getting more and more annoyed by the second. i call steve for sympathy and what does he say???? "be nice to your parents!"

GAH!!!!

anyway, we get on the plane... they give us direct tv for free since it was their fault we were so delayed... i love the food network... i LOVE IT!!!! also, i love watching the old episodes of the love connection... why is it that these 24 year old people look SO damned old??? crazy.

we get off the plane... we start heading to the hertz counter when.... i figure out that i left my folder on the plane. this folder had not only our itineraries in it, but reservation information, directions, addresses, phone numbers... and OUR RETURN TICKETS... holy shit. i flipped out. i ran back to the gate ... i could barely breathe. i got out an "excuse me..." and the no-nonsense woman at the counter just handed me my folder... i was so fucking relieved... i got out a "thank you!" and ran back to where my parents were. they can't be left alone for more than a few minutes... they were already wandering off in some other direction when i got to them...

so, we rent the car (ford focus, baby) and start driving. i just want to GET THERE before it gets dark. it's about a 3 hour drive... but my mom gets motion sickness really easily when she doesn't eat (i get that from her, i guess) so we had to stop at an IHOP.

we get there and as soon as we sit down, i get a call from work.... i forgot to send my boss some information... *sigh* so i'm talking to the admin telling her what folders to find the info in on the laptop at work... and i'm all stressed out... because i can't remember where i kept certain files... but we found them... and all was okay...

my parents (once again) ordered WAY too much food... but my parents got a seniors discount. hehe. he's all happy to be old. :P

we get to lovely keokuk, iowa. there is... uhm... NOTHING THERE. pretty much. it's really fucking depressing. i could NEVER live there...

saw my brother. he looks good. he's not skinny like he used to be. he gained about 40 pounds in muscle. he's not all bulky... more sinewy, if you ask me. heh. except for the acne, he looks good. damn... that's some BAD ACNE. i don't remember mine being that bad. jeezus. it's bad.

he changed a lot on the outside. on the inside, he still wants to do all the shit he was into before... but just the changes on the outside were enough to give me hope for him. he actually hugged us... and even though he got frustrated at my parents, he never yelled at them. never lost his cool... a few of the times that i just about lost it, he kinda patted me on the shoulder and said, "it's okay... you don't need to be all mad... it'll be okay..." that shit made me smile... it's been so long since i have been able to talk to him... and spend time with him... he actually asked about steve and our cousins... this is a guy who thought of no one but himself... so i thought it was sweet that he was asking all these questions...

sure, he could be faking it... like, trying to show us how much he changed so we would take him home... but... whatever... i'll take what i can get...

i missed how he used to be...

after 2 days, though, i think we were all ready to get away from each other... we drove back to st. louis that night. at least it wasn't raining or snowing... it was just cold... we get to the lovely super 8 motel in bridgeton (which is right near the st. louis airport) and we head to our room. and there are all these teens milling about... being loud... pounding on doors, yelling to their friends down another wing... we were like, "WTF is this shit???" okay, *I* was like, "WTF is this shit???" my parents were more like, "what's going on?" and then we get to our room, which is like right next to these fucking brats... and the lights don't even work.

so we had to go back downstairs... and let the guy know what was going on... and he gave us a different room. we got like 3 hours of sleep and headed off to the airport in the morning.

we get to the airport... and i was just ANNOYED... everything my parents said or did made me want to scream. and THEN, i go to the restroom in the airport. when i got in there, there wasn't anyone in there. i went into the 6th out of 10 stalls... and to be honest, i was kinda constipated. these seminars are brutal. you are thirsty, starving, but you just have to SIT THERE.

so, yeah. i was having a little bit of a problem with the pooping and i'm just sitting there... and someone comes into the restroom. i have a little problem going to the restroom when there are people there, but i'm trying to not think about it. just thinking about GOING... and then... the person sits RIGHT NEXT TO ME. WHAT THE FUCK??? why??? they get in the stall to the left of me. by then, my concentration is broken... i'm like... "christ, couldn't you go to ANOTHER FUCKING STALL????"

so, i start trying to concentrate again.... and then someone else comes into the restroom... and gets into the stall right next to me on the right. WHY??? why the fuck? isn't there some sort of unspoken rule that if there are lots of stalls, you put a stall in between you and the next person? fuck, i always do that... i think everyone else should too...

by then, i just about lost it... luckily (after like 5 minutes) i was able to concentrate enough and take my stupid shit... oh, and the best part was, they were all shitting, too. wtf? wtf? wtf? god, that's just frustrating.

anyway, i exit the restroom and i sit next to my parents... when you've only had 3 hours of sleep... there's NOTHING WORSE than listening to the muzak version of "end of the road" (you know, by Boyz II Men... god. i'm embarrassed just typing their name out...). i'm sure you could argue that there are worse things... but for me, that was IT..... i started rocking back and forth in my chair whispering, "make it stop, make it stop, make it stop..." even my crazy mother thought i was crazy... but after 4 days with my parents... doing EVERYTHING for them and shit like that, yeah... i did lose my mind...

we got home okay... all i wanted to do was go home, shower, eat, sleep... not necessarily in that order...

and when steve brought me home, all was well again... he'd cleaned everything :) and he made me dinner :) and he gave me lots of hugs and kisses... there's nothing like coming home to sanity.... :) hehe...

of course i've completely messed the house up again since i've been home... hey, i was exhausted. it was a physically and emotionally draining trip... i'm just glad to be home...